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Snake’s laughing at you, bro.

Okay, so we talked about the blunthead tree snake, right?  Well, the green vine snake (Ahaetulla nasuta) kind of has the same deal going, except it’s mildly venomous as opposed to “pathetically inoffensive to humans,” which is still the harshest burn I’ve seen levied against a reptile ever.

They usually look like normal, if skinny, snakes with kind of ridiculous faces.  If you piss them off or alarm them, though, they flatten out and flash their colors at you.

This has the effect of making the snake look a bit bigger and, if they’re lucky, startling whatever’s ruining their day.  The whole “ridonkulously big skull” thing also helps when they gape, because the open mouth looks like it belongs on a much massier snake than the itty-bitty little thing actually sporting it.

They give birth to live young and can grow up to about five feet, though of course much like with the blunthead tree snake, that still doesn’t translate into a whole lot of snake.

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